Top 5 Reasons Soul Mate Relationships Don’t Work Out

Some soul mate and twin flame relationships can work. However it takes more than the soul connection itself sometimes to make a long term relationship happen. Here are a few common reasons I have found over the years as to why some soul mate relationships (even twin flames) fizzle out.

1. You feel the connection and he does not. He remains more grounded than you are, less affected by the eb and flow of your souls. You feel the feelings very strongly and think he should react similarly but he’s not on the same page.

2. You’re feeling the connection and think that’s going to do the work for you. A lot of times people ignore the psychology necessary to make the relationship work. It’s not all about the spiritual connection, one or both of you still need to have the psychological or relationship skills you need to make a relationship succeed. A lot of times that can boil down to how to make meaningful eye contact, show affection, deal with your anxiety or avoidance as an Attachment Theory, overcoming fears, communication, and compromise.

3. Validation is missing. Even though you feel his soul’s love and connection to you he is not giving you on a physical, conscious level the love and validation you need in order to feel fulfilled. You become disheartened and wonder how he feels or where his head is at in the relationship. Validation can be s simple as a text “Hi”, “Good morning”, or “Thinking of you” to let you know you are important to him and the relationship is still stable. It can be putting in the effort to see you (quality time), giving you a gift or doing you a favor (acts of service). It can also be expressing his feelings which is my next point.

4. He’s not expressing feelings. It can be very frustrating to my clients when they’re feeling such a strong connection with their soul mate’s or twin flame’s soul and he’s not showing that in a physical sense. Often times in many of my readings a very common question can be “how does he feel about me?” “Is he thinking about me?” Even though she can feel a very strong soul connection and she is convinced there is a purpose for the two of them, on a physical level he’s not opening up and expressing his feelings to her. So she remains clueless on how he’s feeling on a conscious level. Sometimes this happens because the men in our society don’t know that they need to follow up more frequently than they think, as well as a cultural pressure for the men in our society to not express emotion which can occur at a very early age. I remember watching my nephew grow up and my brother yelling at him for crying because boys don’t do that. It’s ingrained very early on in their childhood to not express emotion, a lot of social pressure goes into this and it can affect them later on in their relationships.

5. He’s just not that interested. I’m sorry to be harsh here but some people do need a splash of reality every once in awhile to knock them out of an unproductive pattern. A lot of my clients can feel this Soul connection so deeply and it’s kind of an affair of the Soul. However, no matter how much his soul visits you in your dreams and how much you can feel it clairsentiently, on a physical level he is just not that interested in you. A lot of times it can be an attraction issue, in other words he’s not attracted to you and not thinking about you in that way, or he’s just not certain enough about you to be committed to you.

Either way go back to psychology instead of the Soul connection itself. We can have multiple soulmates as we’ve had multiple past lives, and in each of these past lives it’s not always the same soulmate we have a romance with. So you can have many soul mates, and as you open yourself up to spirits and feel more you will find more than just one in a lifetime. I’ve already found a twin flame and multiple soulmates, soul connections and even a couple from my soul group. They can feel like a special connection and feel significant, however it’s going to take more than just a soulmate connection to make a relationship work. Hopefully this article will help you to see why.

If you need a reading to discuss what your angels and guides specifically advise for your relationship, feel free to setup an appointment here today. I offer same day and scheduled readings over phone, skype intl and text.

What if he is unwilling to make the changes necessary to advance the relationship? What you should do is continue looking. Go back to the psychology instead of the feelings alone. Get out there and meet somebody new if you are not exclusive. You may click with someone else, maybe spruce up your wardrobe or how you feel about yourself so you seem more attractive to the gender of your preference and meet new people. You don’t just need a soul mate to have a relationship, but relationship skills seem to be highly useful in order to make the relationship work and it helps when both sides have them and know how to use them. Some of the more successful relationships I’ve seen in the thousands of readings I’ve done over the years is open communication skills. People that can bypass the fears, or don’t seem to have as many blocks to expressing themselves are helpful in making relationships long term.

Also, you may be going through or will go through the grief cycle when transitioning to a new relationship. Be kind to yourself during this time, realize that the denial, bargaining and depression states are temporary and that you can ask for divine help to get you to acceptance. I do offer angelic and spirit guide lead grief advice and energy healing should you need help.

I recommend a few books for further reference, none of which talk about soulmates but rather the practicality of relationships from a psychological perspective as I feel this will help you more in your relationships. Good luck!

Attached” by Amir Levine

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” by John Gray

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Why He is Not Calling and What You Can Do About It. Attachment Theory.

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Are you stuck in an unequal relationship that displays any of these characteristics:

– He doesn’t follow up with contact
– He doesn’t initiate enough or give you enough attention
– He isn’t expressing his feelings but you can tell he has them
– You find yourself in cycles of push/pull, hot/cold, chase/run

I highly recommend this book on attachment theory. It discusses each of the types and how to best deal with their behaviorial issues.

It talks about both perspectives, why you are stuck having feelings for this person who doesnt give you enough love back and why they are pulling away, occasionally coming back to string you along. While there may be deeper metaphysical issues as well which we can discuss in a reading here : www.feathersinfinity.com, this book does give some great pointers on what to heal as well as how to react to your love interest. Sometimes knowing why they are acting this way helps us to react less emotionally and take it less personally.

The books discusses 3 types, the anxious, the stable and the avoidant.

In summary (we can be a mix of any 3 of theThe Anxious – This person is always wondering why he doesnt call, why he doesnt initiate the dates or contact enough, and feels they are constantly chasing someone who does not show enough appreciation for them. However they find themselves in love with the other party, stuck in an unending cycle, hoping he’ll change. Often times lack of action from their love interest ruins their day or part of their day and can be a source of anxiety for the person.

  • Avoidant – An avoidant personality wants to maintain their independence, is afraid of getting hurt but tries not to show it, and often pulls away for a time until they miss a person and then pop back into the love interests life when they feel ready. They are consistantly inconsistant, they think people should hide their emotions and have difficulty expressing themselves. They have deep feelings too but try to push them away and control them due to lack of trust.
  • Stable – This is the personality type that we hope to achieve, a good balance of empathy to know when your partner needs affection and attention, expressing their own emotions and is able to be more vulnerable on a healthy way with their partner. Stable people can be with all 3 personalities because they have the wisdom and empathy to understand the others’ point of view and can tend to their needs without as much emotional turmoil.

Client’s Love & Relationship Question

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LOVE & RELATIONSHIP QUESTION

A client the other day asked me why her relationship not working out if she and her love interest had so much in common.

The answers I received from spirit were two-fold.  One, soul connections are brought into our lives and there is often a purpose to it.  You may pick up on the uniqueness of the connection, however that doesn’t mean it will work out forever, or “til death do you part”.  Sometimes you learn something from them and move on.  Both partners need to work through their issues.  Spirit showed me paths splitting due to a fork in the road; in other words your life paths may not be parallel for the rest of your lives and it can cause a struggle or feeling of incompleteness later in the relationship.  Some couples, including soul connections & Soul Mates, are short term for various reasons.  The second message I received was to discuss my parents.  My parents have been married over 51 years and still going strong.  They are almost complete opposites; one extremely logical and the other very good at expressing her emotions.  In some ways they make up for what the other lacks and can be a very good paring.  Sometimes they don’t understand each other at all, but they accept it, or ask their children what the other means as we have become translators for each side.  They make it work doing their own thing as they are very independent people with unique interests.

Society today, probably because of movies and other forms of entertainment, make us feel that we are to match up and be completely like our mate, however 50+ years ago the opposite was believed.  The full spectrum of similarities and differences can work out potentially.  If you have differences, great!  That could make it interesting for you and they can turn out to be helpful to you in the future.

Need more advice?  Check out my website www.feathersinfinity.com for readings and healing.

Ending Negative Relationship Cycles you Feel Stuck In

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Are you seeing cycles or patterns in your relationship that don’t seem to stop no matter what you do? Do you feel chained to someone with no relief in sight?  You may have a karmic debt with this person.  We can have many past lives with someone, and when you feel you are in a negative cycle with someone that you feel you can’t get out of, then it would be a good idea to cut the cords to the past.  This stops the negative cycles with someone and that chained feeling, not necessarily your relationship with the person.

How to cut cords to the past:
-Close your eyes
-Take three deep breaths
-Go up into space and pretend you are meeting God, in an area where there is only light
-Ask God to cut any past negative karmic cords you have with that person
-Give it some time to work, wait for a warming or tingling sensation to end
-When you feel or think it is complete you can open your eyes

This will cut any past negative karmic cords or debt you have with this person and the seemingly unending cycles of grief, sorrow and control can end.

If you need more help with your relationship or healing, please feel free to visit my website, http://www.feathersinfinity.com and sign up for a theta healing session with me.

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Sexual Fears

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Many of us have had multiple past lives, and often times have been both genders. You don’t have to go too far in the past on earth to see that women were not treated that well in the bedroom or outside of it. Chances are high you probably did not have great sexual experiences in your past lives (or even this one for that matter). On top of that, if you were a woman in a past life you very well could have had a miscarriage or died during childbirth.

So you know you have some fears in that area, what can you do about it?

Sex, childbirth and gender issues (as well as relationship issues) tend to be centered around the sacral charka, or abdominal area. Now if we are talking about death during childbirth or a violation sexually, then that is Root chakra, or safety. The root chakra is best described as the area at the base of your spine. I would recommend healing both of these chakras at the same time for sexual issues.

The color for sacral chakra is orange and coordinates with sunstone, orange calcite, or copper. Moonstone is great on this area as well. The color for root chakra is red. My favorites are red tiger eye, and red jasper (some black stones are excellent as well such as black tourmaline, onyx, and obsidian. Black is usually grounding stones. Steer clear of “magic” stones such as Merlinite and Nummite.).  Red tiger eye is best for sexual issues including arousal.

Ask God to send you healers to best help heal your past life and current life sexual issues. You can be more specific if you’d like or keep it general. If you are not comfortable with talking to God, I recommend asking Archangel Raphael and Jesus or Mary or Buddha. Then meditate with the crystals listed above and/or concentrate on orange and red.

Affirmations:

Affirmations said out loud or written down are extremely useful and quick way to open and heal your chakras. Say or write down three times for intention.

Sacral: “I relate to others with ease” (3x)

Root: “I am safe and protected” (3x)

For more advice, see my website, www.feathersinfinity.com.

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In a controlling or manipulative relationship?

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Many controlling relationships are to teach us to stand up for ourselves, that we have worth/deserve what we really want, and, you guessed it, to love ourselves. Why do you feel that you can’t stand up for yourself? Why did you get into the relationship to begin with? I’ve spoken to many women in the same position, and much of the time it is because they don’t have a job, fears of losing money/home, fears of arguments/separation going horribly wrong or because of kids. If they think they have something over you, they can use that against you, either directly spoken or indirectly implied. Sometimes it may all be in your mind, because of beliefs or fears in your subconscious/conscious. Whatever the reason is, it’s time to work on your solar plexus, and probably your throat chakra as well.

The Solar Plexus is right around your stomach (many people with control or manipulation issues have stomach issues such as overeating, anorexia, bulimia or addiction issues). The chakra color is yellow, so meditating with yellow stones such as citrine, yellow calcite, and angel wing calcite helps. You can also visualize yellow when you meditate. Ask your angels, ascended masters (Jesus, Mary, Buddha, etc) and/or God to help heal your solar plexus issues while meditating, in both past lives and current life.  If you don’t meditate, ask them to heal you overnight.

The throat chakra is at the bottom of your throat, and when out of balance you either don’t speak up enough or you talk too much. Similarly, someone who is overly controlling to others can have an out of balance solar plexus chakra. Do the same meditation and healing for the throat as you did for the solar plexus but with blue stones/crystals or by visualizing blue.

When you are being controlled it is often because you don’t love yourself enough to stand up for yourself, or you feel you can’t because of money, children, fear of change, etc. Each of these may be linked to subconscious fears, past lives or other levels best healed with Theta Healing. Feel free to contact me at www.feathersinfinity.com for a theta healing session.

Affirmations:

You can also heal your chakras by saying affirmations three times to yourself (saying them out loud or writing them down is best)

Solar Plexus Chakra Affirmation: “I Stand in My Unique Power.” (3x)

Throat Chakra Affirmation: “I Express My Truth” (3x)

An excellent book that I still refer to is “The Book of Chakra Healing” by Liz Simpson. It includes colors, yoga moves, crystals, archetypes, and affirmations for each chakra. The only thing she doesn’t include is sound frequencies to heal/clear chakras. There may be other resources for sound frequency healing using crystal bowls, tuning forks, and gongs to name a few.

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Stop the Relationship Patterns!

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Do you see patterns play over and over again in your life, particularly with one person?  I noticed something that happened in all my relationships, including with my soul mate, so I used a ritual taught to me by an akashic record expert.  I asked God to tell my soul mate’s guardian angels that I was sorry if I did (the pattern) to them in any life we had together, and that I forgive myself and I forgive that person.  Then the pattern stopped.  If you see patterns in your relationships, I would recommend using this method to stop that pattern so you can move on with your life.  You don’t have to suffer.  Best of luck!  Want more advice?  I am a Psychic Medium and offer psychic mediumship readings day or night.  Visit my website at http://www.feathersinfinity.com.  Look forward to speaking with you!

Want a reading or healing from me?  Find my rates at www.feathersinfinity.com.

Do You Feel Like You Do All the Giving?

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Do you feel like you do all the giving in your relationship?  Well, you may be with someone who is comfortable with receiving, but not really in giving back.  A lot of times, some of us are raised to think it is better to give than receive and get to the point in our lives where we feel guilty for receiving.  Then the people we are paired with have gotten comfortable with receiving and may even be dependant on those that give too much because they never learned to take care of themselves.  When you have a giving and receiving imbalance resentment can build but also the giver can feel drained after a time.  Instead of trying to change the other person, I would ask your angels to help you receive more in your life.  Your angels can help you receive more in your life from other places to help you feel less drained.  Waiting for your partner, parent, friend or sibling to give more might take a while, or not happen at all, take care of yourself now and ask for assistance from the universe.  When the gifts come, be sure to receive them openly.  I have other hints and tricks to help you feel less drained and more balanced everday.  Check it out on the readings and healings page : http://www.feathersinfinity.com/readings-healing.html

Want a reading or healing from me?  Find my rates at www.feathersinfinity.com.

This blog is provided completely for free.  Any ads go to wordpress not myself.  If you like the advice and would like to see it continue, please feel free to sponsor this blog using Paypal here. Disclaimer

Random Anxious Feelings

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Do you feel anxious, scared or upset and don’t know why?  Do you have this lump or energy in your throat and don’t know why you feel this way and want it to go away?  Chances are you are not feeling your own emotions but someone else’s.  There are spiritual linkages called cords that connect us to those that we care about as well as those that we haven’t met yet but share a soul connection with.  You can ask your angels to release these cords from you or you can seek out an energy healer to help you with them.  You may need to do some healing on the past associated with those individuals, which energy healers can help with as well.  I usually recommend Theta healing for mind, body and spiritual healing, as it can address core, genetic, past life and soul level pain.  If you are feeling these symptoms of distress or anxiety and you don’t know why you are having them chances are you are feeling someone else’s energy and need cords cut.  I can always help you out or you can ask your angels to help out, such as Archangel Michael, Kam or Gabriel.  Visit my site at http://www.feathersinfinity.com.

Angel Signs and Messages