Top 5 Reasons Soul Mate Relationships Don’t Work Out

Some soul mate and twin flame relationships can work. However it takes more than the soul connection itself sometimes to make a long term relationship happen. Here are a few common reasons I have found over the years as to why some soul mate relationships (even twin flames) fizzle out.

1. You feel the connection and he does not. He remains more grounded than you are, less affected by the eb and flow of your souls. You feel the feelings very strongly and think he should react similarly but he’s not on the same page.

2. You’re feeling the connection and think that’s going to do the work for you. A lot of times people ignore the psychology necessary to make the relationship work. It’s not all about the spiritual connection, one or both of you still need to have the psychological or relationship skills you need to make a relationship succeed. A lot of times that can boil down to how to make meaningful eye contact, show affection, deal with your anxiety or avoidance as an Attachment Theory, overcoming fears, communication, and compromise.

3. Validation is missing. Even though you feel his soul’s love and connection to you he is not giving you on a physical, conscious level the love and validation you need in order to feel fulfilled. You become disheartened and wonder how he feels or where his head is at in the relationship. Validation can be s simple as a text “Hi”, “Good morning”, or “Thinking of you” to let you know you are important to him and the relationship is still stable. It can be putting in the effort to see you (quality time), giving you a gift or doing you a favor (acts of service). It can also be expressing his feelings which is my next point.

4. He’s not expressing feelings. It can be very frustrating to my clients when they’re feeling such a strong connection with their soul mate’s or twin flame’s soul and he’s not showing that in a physical sense. Often times in many of my readings a very common question can be “how does he feel about me?” “Is he thinking about me?” Even though she can feel a very strong soul connection and she is convinced there is a purpose for the two of them, on a physical level he’s not opening up and expressing his feelings to her. So she remains clueless on how he’s feeling on a conscious level. Sometimes this happens because the men in our society don’t know that they need to follow up more frequently than they think, as well as a cultural pressure for the men in our society to not express emotion which can occur at a very early age. I remember watching my nephew grow up and my brother yelling at him for crying because boys don’t do that. It’s ingrained very early on in their childhood to not express emotion, a lot of social pressure goes into this and it can affect them later on in their relationships.

5. He’s just not that interested. I’m sorry to be harsh here but some people do need a splash of reality every once in awhile to knock them out of an unproductive pattern. A lot of my clients can feel this Soul connection so deeply and it’s kind of an affair of the Soul. However, no matter how much his soul visits you in your dreams and how much you can feel it clairsentiently, on a physical level he is just not that interested in you. A lot of times it can be an attraction issue, in other words he’s not attracted to you and not thinking about you in that way, or he’s just not certain enough about you to be committed to you.

Either way go back to psychology instead of the Soul connection itself. We can have multiple soulmates as we’ve had multiple past lives, and in each of these past lives it’s not always the same soulmate we have a romance with. So you can have many soul mates, and as you open yourself up to spirits and feel more you will find more than just one in a lifetime. I’ve already found a twin flame and multiple soulmates, soul connections and even a couple from my soul group. They can feel like a special connection and feel significant, however it’s going to take more than just a soulmate connection to make a relationship work. Hopefully this article will help you to see why.

If you need a reading to discuss what your angels and guides specifically advise for your relationship, feel free to setup an appointment here today. I offer same day and scheduled readings over phone, skype intl and text.

What if he is unwilling to make the changes necessary to advance the relationship? What you should do is continue looking. Go back to the psychology instead of the feelings alone. Get out there and meet somebody new if you are not exclusive. You may click with someone else, maybe spruce up your wardrobe or how you feel about yourself so you seem more attractive to the gender of your preference and meet new people. You don’t just need a soul mate to have a relationship, but relationship skills seem to be highly useful in order to make the relationship work and it helps when both sides have them and know how to use them. Some of the more successful relationships I’ve seen in the thousands of readings I’ve done over the years is open communication skills. People that can bypass the fears, or don’t seem to have as many blocks to expressing themselves are helpful in making relationships long term.

Also, you may be going through or will go through the grief cycle when transitioning to a new relationship. Be kind to yourself during this time, realize that the denial, bargaining and depression states are temporary and that you can ask for divine help to get you to acceptance. I do offer angelic and spirit guide lead grief advice and energy healing should you need help.

I recommend a few books for further reference, none of which talk about soulmates but rather the practicality of relationships from a psychological perspective as I feel this will help you more in your relationships. Good luck!

Attached” by Amir Levine

Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus” by John Gray

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Why He is Not Calling and What You Can Do About It. Attachment Theory.

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Are you stuck in an unequal relationship that displays any of these characteristics:

– He doesn’t follow up with contact
– He doesn’t initiate enough or give you enough attention
– He isn’t expressing his feelings but you can tell he has them
– You find yourself in cycles of push/pull, hot/cold, chase/run

I highly recommend this book on attachment theory. It discusses each of the types and how to best deal with their behaviorial issues.

It talks about both perspectives, why you are stuck having feelings for this person who doesnt give you enough love back and why they are pulling away, occasionally coming back to string you along. While there may be deeper metaphysical issues as well which we can discuss in a reading here : www.feathersinfinity.com, this book does give some great pointers on what to heal as well as how to react to your love interest. Sometimes knowing why they are acting this way helps us to react less emotionally and take it less personally.

The books discusses 3 types, the anxious, the stable and the avoidant.

In summary (we can be a mix of any 3 of theThe Anxious – This person is always wondering why he doesnt call, why he doesnt initiate the dates or contact enough, and feels they are constantly chasing someone who does not show enough appreciation for them. However they find themselves in love with the other party, stuck in an unending cycle, hoping he’ll change. Often times lack of action from their love interest ruins their day or part of their day and can be a source of anxiety for the person.

  • Avoidant – An avoidant personality wants to maintain their independence, is afraid of getting hurt but tries not to show it, and often pulls away for a time until they miss a person and then pop back into the love interests life when they feel ready. They are consistantly inconsistant, they think people should hide their emotions and have difficulty expressing themselves. They have deep feelings too but try to push them away and control them due to lack of trust.
  • Stable – This is the personality type that we hope to achieve, a good balance of empathy to know when your partner needs affection and attention, expressing their own emotions and is able to be more vulnerable on a healthy way with their partner. Stable people can be with all 3 personalities because they have the wisdom and empathy to understand the others’ point of view and can tend to their needs without as much emotional turmoil.