The Good Ones Aren’t All Taken

I was wandering the library looking for something new to read and I found this book with the little chocolate truffle in the front and I thought it looked delicious so I brought it home. I finished this book in about 2 days.

It describes several personality types and psychological problems that may commonly occur with women that prevents them from having a long-lasting relationship. The author describes these personality types as the following:

+ The Old Faithful – if you stay attached to an ex for an unusually long time comparative to others around you, if you’re feeling like you missed out on your “one true” chance for love, or have beliefs in “The One”

+ The Whirlwind Dater – this is someone who dates a lot but has not settled on one man for a long period of time, this is also someone who has a hard time relaxing

+ The Standstill – this person rarely if ever dates, this can be common with those that are still a virgin or have only had sex a handful of times or less. This person is afraid of anyone finding out how little they have dated or have been intimate and often get embarrassed when someone asks them when was their last date and how often they’ve dated.

+ The Forbidden Fruit Hunter – this person is continually attracted to those that are unavailable or married, they may reject nice guys who show interest that are available, they may come from a single-parent home or has strong emotional connections with their family

+ The Compassionate Rescuer – this person has a hard time saying no to people, they feel like they have to rescue someone or is habitually with someone that they feel needs them, they continually try to stay flexible in order to please others, they give more then they receive in relationships, they are often condescended to or controlled by family or partners

+ The Wanderer – this woman is the life of the party, can make friends very easily but has a hard time staying faithful and hops from one relationship to another, they can get anxious if they’re not in a relationship and like to indulge in things that are pleasurable or celebratory

+ The Uptown Girl – she enjoys compliments and dresses or looks the part so she can get a lot of compliments. They look for men that either have money, status or power.

+ The Runaway Bride – very similar to the movie, this person is somebody that really doesn’t know themselves and doesn’t stay in a relationship very long, they commonly bolt when the relationship gets too serious

The book mainly outlines some common psychological issues that prevent you from seeing the situation as it truly is. One of which that she talks about is subconscious beliefs that are sabotaging you. If you find yourself in a situation after a date or when someone finds you attractive that you start having a lot of negative thoughts then you may need to work on your subconscious beliefs. I recommend using Theta healing which I do provide on my website which has turned much of my life around towards the positive as well as my thinking. Theta can affect Law of Attraction and the type of people that you draw to you as well as how they treat you when they are in your life. It can affect those that are already in your life as well and how they treat you but in a different more positive way. You can find my Theta healing offerings here. Theta healing works on current life, past life, and other soul level beliefs, removing the negative beliefs and replacing it with positive which in turn affects how people see you, how you think and what you attract to you.

Two other of the more common issues that she discusses is the signs that you may have intimacy issues because you are trying to fit in a man’s world so you act professionally when you should act more sexual or feminine to a love interest. Essentially you have not learned how to be feminine, open or sexy and are uncomfortable in that role.

The other common issue she describes is feeling overly responsible for your parents’ happiness, usually one parent over the other. You’ve taken on a role that subconsciously and consciously you will have a hard time separating yourself from. You may enter into a relationship and start wondering, “but who’s going to take care of Mom?”

This is just a quick summary of the book, there are other issues and solutions provided. I highly recommend you get the book from your local library or Amazon to see which of these personality types best describes you. You may be a combination of all the above. Once you’ve figured out your patterns that will give you a launching point to then find the healing modality that best works for you to turn your life and thinking around.

Need more love and relationship advice? I’ve been giving advice for years. You can find my psychic mediumship reading offerings under my readings page here: www.mediumandreaknight.com/readings.html

Why We Want Those Who We Can’t Have and What to do about it

There are a few psychological and metaphysical reasons why you may be interested in somebody who is either not interested in you or that treats you poorly.

1. You are connecting to their soul energy, you’ve pierced through their outer layers and have gotten to a spiritual side of them that contains unconditional love. As you try to concentrate on other things, thoughts of them pop up in your mind because your energies are communicating. The problem is if on a physical level they are not as aware of this as you are, and are not interested in you in that way, they may not treat you very well or really contact you much at all. This leads me to the psychological problems that can lead to feeling “stuck” on a person.

2. When someone is busy or doesn’t take much interest in us we think that they’re more special or have more value. When someone is busy sometimes we interpret that as they’re more important, that they have more friends, and are more popular than us. We put them on a pedestal thinking they are more rare and harder to get, increasing their “scarcity“, and therefore boosting their value in our mind. This is also why someone who “breadcrumbs” you, in other words only contacts you every once in awhile, can get you addicted to them as well.

3. If you have a pattern of wanting people that are either taken or hard to actually be with in a relationship you may have a fear of your relationships failing. In other words you put yourself in a position where you never actually get together with the person so it can never really fail, thereby avoiding heartbreak, humiliation, social judgement from friends and family. You may have to face the beliefs as to why you don’t actually want to be in a real relationship due to fears of it failing. For this I recommend theta healing, which works on fears and beliefs on a subconscious level, which I can provide over distance on my website: www.mediumandreaknight.com

4. You get more of a rush mentally with dopamine when you have a roller coaster ride relationship than with a steady one. If you fantasize or are around that person for a shorter period of time you get that jolt of dopamine and then you leave them it allows you to reset so when you come back to them you get that jolt of dopamine again. To stay with them for a longer period of time where it is consistently good doesn’t give you that rush of dopamine after a period of absence.

5. Something feels unresolved or incomplete after you’ve been chasing them for a while? Maybe it feels unbalanced and you want it to feel equal. If you look up the reciprocity principal as I learned in Marketing, people feel obligated to return a favor. In this case you may have given this person a lot of attention, a lot of energetic love, and a lot of your mental time. Your brain wants something back in other words you want reciprocity. The unfortunate instance here is that you just may not get it back. What I recommend is a grief healing to get you to acceptance which I can also provide through my energy healing services on my website. www.mediumandreaknight.com

Recommendations:

1. Compartmentalize – this is a coping mechanism that helps you to focus on things like work and other areas of your life while shelving your romantic life for a while. It helps you not lose your life while you are thinking about or feeling stuck on another person.
2. Watch something that puts you in a better mood – for me this is youtube videos on comedy, interviews with mentors or animals. Get out of depression and feeling spent or empty from giving them so much love and attention and receiving little back.
3. Date other people – know you’re worth it and receive some of those compliments you are giving to someone else.
4. Work on yourself – psychologically and metaphysically, change how you see the situation. Someone treating you like crud should not be attractive and shouldn’t pull you towards them, instead know intellectually why this is happening to you by reading articles like this or books so when you encounter it you can change the situation and bring someone to you that treats you better. Go to my website, I provide theta healing which work on the fears and beliefs that sabotage you. Www.mediumandreaknight.com

Other reads:

+ Attached by Levine, Amir find at amazon.com

+ Men are from Mars and Woman are from Venus by Gray, John PhD

Soul Mates and the Stages of Grief

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Sometimes all you have to do is go through a rejection by someone in order to enter into a grieving period. Many of my clients have been rejected by those they feel are either their soulmates or twin flames. I’ve noticed that many people go through the stages of grief when they are rejected by someone they are attracted to, interested in or in love with. The problem is I don’t think they recognize that are going through the stages, instead they’re just feeling they’re emotions and reacting.

The denial stage is obvious. It’s essentially when you’re in denial and you can’t believe what just happened to you. Sometimes there’s a shock stage before denial but the denial stage is very real. It prevents you from seeing what is really happening, often times our ego wall might come up and we won’t see from the other person’s perspective. Next comes anger which is usually from being in a place of the ego reacting to getting rejected and trying to make up another story (they have issues, it is their fault, something is wrong with them) as well as lashing out at whoever rejected you. This can be in varying degrees, some people may not get that angry and instead get sad (low self esteem) and some people might start thinking about revenge. Bargaining comes around when someone often thinks that this is the only one they have a chance to be with or they’re not going to find someone else that they have a strong feelings for, which is not true, we have multiple soul mates. This can be a very embarrassing, uncomfortable stage that I don’t wish on anyone. They may turn to God or psychics for extreme solutions that they may feel embarrassed about later or when they realize what they asked for or tried to do. During this stage I will often put them in their love-interest shoes. I ask them how would you like it if somebody tried to force you to love them using God or spirits if you were not initially interested? They all calm down at that point and answer that they wouldn’t like it very much. It is an eye opener.

Then I usually share with them a more realistic solution. There’s some excellent books out there such as “The Like Button” that tells you how to gradually get somebody to be more comfortable in your presence or be curious about you. A lot of times this is just being around them, being in the same room, not necessarily always talking to them. A great way to explain this is to use the example of a deer and a bunny in a prairie. When the bunny first enters the prairie the deer might get spooked and run off. Overtime the bunny continues to enter the prairie but stays at a distance, not threatening the deer. This lets the deer know that the bunny is not dangerous because over time the bunny is not actually doing anything harmful. Slowly, the bunny can get closer without spooking the deer. I highly recommend “The Like Button” as well as Dale Carnegie’s “How to Make Friends and Influence People”. Some people may get spooked when you first show that you’re interested in them but it is possible to come back in a less scary manner and over time they can become curious about you, and more comfortable around you. You may become friends or you may become something more, this may just depend on a number of variables on both sides.

If you feel like you’re going through any of these stages of grief I highly recommend that you go through a healing process where you can get to the acceptance stage. I usually call an ascended Master such as Jesus, Mary, or Buddha as well as Archangel Artiya’il while laying down on my bed and ask them to help me get to the acceptance stage with whatever I’m struggling with at that time. Wait and feel much of the healing at the bottom of your lungs to clear before returning to your day.  When the soreness or feeling in your lungs dissipate the healing is done.  This can help push you past the stages of bargaining, anger and depression and into a more peaceful place. When you get to this peaceful place you no longer feel this urge or anguish over wanting to change the situation at any means possible. The sadness and depression go away. Then you’re more open to other options and no longer have that heart block that prevents you from seeing them or considering them.

If you need more help go to the top toolbar, I have different psychic reading options for you so you can talk to me in person, over the phone, or Skype/text chat.

Psychic Medium Andrea

When He’s Not Telling You How He Feels

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I do many readings for others and a lot of my readings are situations where a woman is attracted to a guy and keeps good contact with them but he’s not revealing his feelings enough to her. Clients often ask me why they have this pattern where the man is not revealing his feelings enough in the relationship. Some of this can be explained by Attachment Theory as someone is attracted to another person who is what they call an “avoidant” and it makes the client very anxious waiting for some sort of validation of his feelings in a verbal sense. Also look into your past. Were you ever in a situation where someone expressed emotion from the get-go and you were turned off and even ran away? Did you find yourself saying things like “oh he’s needy”, “oh he’s insecure”, “he’s desperate” or “he’s a stalker”. Be careful what you’re telling the universe when you are approached by someone who is open with emotion who does let you know how they feel. If you feel negatively about someone who expresses themselves openly then that in a way can explain why you’re in the situation you are in. If you’re attracted to those who do not openly express emotion in the beginning and turned off by those who do openly express emotion you may continue to be in relationships with those that have trouble expressing affection and love.

Some clients ask me how do I stop this pattern of being with these guys that don’t openly express their feelings. My recommendation is two fold. First reverse you’re thinking and reactions when you encounter someone who openly shows emotion. If you find yourself taking a step back in fear the problem may not be the person that is expressing themselves; it may be time to look at why you’re uncomfortable with someone showing you affection. The second recommendation is to look for either a behavioral psychiatrist who can do some sort of hypnotherapy on your subconscious or a Theta healer who essentially does the same thing but on multiple metaphysical levels including past lives, soul level, current life and genetic levels. My own Theta Healing also concentrates on the mind or mental level as well as the Akashic records. Theta healing removes the negative beliefs and fears that cause you to react this way and replaces them with something more positive and in line with what you really want.  I was led to add mental and akashic records healing to my Theta while doing readings for others and seeing the need. If you’d like to look at some of my energy healing options feel free to look on my website here www.feathersinfinity.com/energy-healing.html.  They can be done over the phone or in person just as effectively.  I also do Mediumship readings here: www.feathersinfinity.com/readings.html.

Why is he not calling and what you can do about it. Attachment Theory

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Are you stuck in an unequal relationship that displays any of these characteristics:

– He doesn’t follow up with contact
– He doesn’t initiate enough or give you enough attention
– He isn’t expressing his feelings but you can tell he has them
– You find yourself in cycles of push/pull, hot/cold, chase/run

I highly recommend this book on attachment theory. It discusses each of the types and how to best deal with their behaviorial issues.

It talks about both perspectives, why you are stuck having feelings for this person who doesnt give you enough love back and why they are pulling away, occasionally coming back to string you along. While there may be deeper metaphysical issues as well which we can discuss in a reading here : www.feathersinfinity.com, this book does give some great pointers on what to heal as well as how to react to your love interest. Sometimes knowing why they are acting this way helps us to react less emotionally and take it less personally.

The books discusses 3 types, the anxious, the stable and the avoidant.

In summary (we can be a mix of any 3 of these):

  • The anxious – This person is always wondering why he doesnt call, why he doesnt initiate the dates or contact enough, and feels they are constantly chasing someone who does not show enough appreciation for them. However they find themselves in love with the other party, stuck in an unending cycle, hoping he’ll change. Often times lack of action from their love interest ruins their day or part of their day and can be a source of anxiety for the person.
  • Avoidant – An avoidant personality wants to maintain their independence, is afraid of getting hurt but tries not to show it, and often pulls away for a time until they miss a person and then pop back into the love interests life when they feel ready. They are consistantly inconsistant, they think people should hide their emotions and have difficulty expressing themselves. They have deep feelings too but try to push them away and control them due to lack of trust.
  • Stable – This is the personality type that we hope to achieve, a good balance of empathy to know when your partner needs affection and attention, expressing their own emotions and is able to be more vulnerable on a healthy way with their partner. Stable people can be with all 3 personalities because they have the wisdom and empathy to understand the others’ point of view and can tend to their needs without as much emotional turmoil.

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http://amzn.to/2pg2qy9

When you love someone so strongly and they don’t love you back

I was going through a reading and I was reminded of situations where someone will see through to someone’s soul and love them so completely but the other person does not feel the same. It was shown to me clairvoyantly and intuitively what happens. Essentially the one that falls hard and feels the unconditional love for the other person sees straight through all the outer facades, layers, thoughts about self, egos and into their soul. It was explained to me that the soul is more pure and without much of the other cultural facades we put up to fit in. It is essentially a soul loving another soul, piercing through all that other stuff. Unfortunately for me this has happened multiple times where I see through people, see their potential when they do not. Thank goodness, the most recent time it happened, I was able to recover very quickly, let go and move on better. Note that I’ve been doing energy healing for years and working on myself, I know this isn’t easy without those tools. However, what I did was express my feelings quickly rather than tucking them away for years. Once I got the feelings out, I felt infinitely better (this doesnt mean they’ll be mutually interested btw, they are probably not seeing as deeply as you). The reasoning I saw during a reading for someone else was that they were not doing the same, essentially not seeing through to the soul and experiencing the same level of feelings. This happens a lot, it’s not just you and me. I know this because I do readings most days. If you can’t express your feelings to the other person because of fear of rejection (it really helps to work on this – contact me for theta healing. It affects more than just relationships) then write your feelings down and burn them if you don’t feel it will work out for one reason or another. Then pray and ask God to help you move on in the best and highest way for you. Ask God for the suffering to stop. Know that the lesson in these cases, that I have received in my readings, is to know that we are all connected, to become closer to the Divine and spirituality.

Need more tips or a personal reading? Go to Www.feathersinfinity.com

Random Anxious Feelings

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Do you feel anxious, scared or upset and don’t know why?  Do you have this lump or energy in your throat and don’t know why you feel this way and want it to go away?  Chances are you are not feeling your own emotions but someone else’s.  There are spiritual linkages called cords that connect us to those that we care about as well as those that we haven’t met yet but share a soul connection with.  You can ask your angels to release these cords from you or you can seek out an energy healer to help you with them.  You may need to do some healing on the past associated with those individuals, which energy healers can help with as well.  I usually recommend Theta healing for mind, body and spiritual healing, as it can address core, genetic, past life and soul level pain.  If you are feeling these symptoms of distress or anxiety and you don’t know why you are having them chances are you are feeling someone else’s energy and need cords cut.  I can always help you out or you can ask your angels to help out, such as Archangel Michael, Kam or Gabriel.  Visit my site at http://www.feathersinfinity.com.

https://feathersinfinity.wordpress.com/2014/09/03/angel-signs-and-messages/

 

How do I keep my vibration high?

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There are many ways to keep your vibration high.  Something every one can do regardless of where you are on your spiritual journey is eat less processed foods or foods with a barcode, and eat more organic.  The less sugar, caffeine and carbs which turn into sugar is best.  Eat more fruits and vegetables and animal products with less hormones and where the animal was treated better when it was alive.  If you are adept at energy healing such as Reiki it helps to clear your main chakras once a day if not every other day.  There is also any excellent Youtube video out there that gives you 20 ways to raise your vibration which is quite excellent (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kQ5Oy4Ja9fI).  Some of the examples is to look at something beautiful, smell one of your favorite smells, practice mudras, write down what you are grateful for, listen to music you love, give something to someone else, listen to music in 528hz, listen to ancient chants, do yoga, and breathe more deeply.  Another thing I have learned that heals and helps with your vibration is imagining a blue light around you and breathe that in imagining the blue light filling your entire inner body.  Try some of these out and you’ll feel the difference.

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Manifest Your Desires!


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Do you want to change your life?  Did you just get your reading of the future and not like the outcome?  Manifest!  Manifestation can bring more of the things you want to you, whether it is love, career, or a home.  To manifest, think of what you want as if you already have it right now.  Leave your fears and worries out of your manifestation unless you want those things to come to you.  Using the New Moon or Full Moon energies help enhance your manifestation energy.  Once you have your desires in mind release it to the universe.  It helps to write 5-8 things down if you prefer as well.  Writing or speaking has more energy behind it than thoughts.  Imagine you are drawing it to you naturally.  Want to know more?  Go to www.feathersinfinity.com to setup a reading with me.  I’ll be happy to discuss this with you.  Good Luck!

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Use your Intuition!

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Are you intuitive?  Do you just know things for no logical reason but know you are right?  Do you seem to know things about others without hearing about them from somewhere else.  You are probably an intuitive and have a great gift from God.  How do you use it?  Continue to listen to your hunches and urgings.  If it is positive and feels good it came from your higher self or from the light.  If it’s negative then it probably came from fear, so don’t listen to the negative advice, thoughts and feelings for now.  If your idea seems to come from nowhere and feels good to you, go for it.  Over time you will receive enough validation that you’re intuition is leading you in the right direction!  Want to know more?  Go to www.feathersinfinity.com to setup a reading with me.  I’ll be happy to discuss this with you.  Good Luck!

This blog is provided completely for free.  Any ads go to wordpress not myself.  If you like the advice and would like to see it continue, please feel free to sponsor this blog using Paypal here. Disclaimer